Entry
Turn the other cheek / Choose differently
What did Jesus mean
Choose differently.
Where did Jesus say this
Matthew 5:39 — “But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.”
Luke 6:29 — “To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also…”
A history lesson
First Century, Rome: Hitting someone with an open palm meant you were “equal” to them. Hitting someone with your backhand insinuated you were “above” them. Typically, this was between a master and a slave or a husband and a wife. It was a dominance play that upheld social hierarchy.
If you “turned your cheek” as a “superior” was gearing up to slap you, then that person would be forced to come back around with an open palm. (It also made them look a little silly — imagine it in your head.) If that person re-positioned and hit with an open palm, you removed the illusion of hierarchy, asserted your own dominance, and made yourself equals.
What Jesus did not mean
Be weak.
Most people hear this term and think Jesus meant to be weak. Take what you’re given. Don’t put up a fight. Allow it to happen.
But if you re-examine our history lesson, it’s quite the opposite.
Jesus wants you to assert yourself. Be powerful. Just don’t drop to their standards.
And that leads us to another thing Jesus did not mean.
If someone treats you poorly, your response should not be to treat them poorly in return. Here’s an example:
Situation: Someone insults you in public.
- Ignore them and don’t bring it up. That’s weak and doesn’t solve the issue. It only hides the issue and likely makes it worse for you.
- Insult them back in public. That’s dropping to their standards. You now have become them.
- Have a conversation with them in private. This keeps you strong, yet grounded in who you are. Ask them to help you understand, and in the process, hopefully they will understand that what they did was wrong and they will choose differently next time.
The goal is not to shame or ridicule. The goal is to stand your ground — but your ground, not theirs.
Where to start
Turn the other cheek has become a phrase of meekness, timidity. But it’s not that at all. It is incredibly powerful.
It might be easy to let someone have their moment of power over you. But that moment will wreak havoc in your heart and mind. Don’t let it.
Don’t close the door on yourself.
It might be hard to sit with anger, sadness, or confusion. But if you can do this, you might just be powerful enough to change someone’s mind.
Open the door for someone else. Invite them in.
Benefits
You remain who you are and grounded.
You may help someone else.
Also said as: turn the other cheek · if someone strikes you on the right cheek · do not resist an evil person